But you are my friend.
I KILL YOU FOR FREE.
Sunday, July 7, 2013
Mobile
What happened 2 Ur mobile?
I was trying 2 call you but i got this msg:
Welcome 2 jungle network , D monkey U r trying 2 call is on tree PLZ try later.
I was trying 2 call you but i got this msg:
Welcome 2 jungle network , D monkey U r trying 2 call is on tree PLZ try later.
B/P
If Ur World is spining Round & Round ...& Round .....
Your heart is beating fast.
Do U think its Love?
Na munna na its called high B/P.
Your heart is beating fast.
Do U think its Love?
Na munna na its called high B/P.
First Travel
First travel the path , know perfectly well where it leads only then can u hold hands of others and take them on the path
I wiSh ...
I wish God made me a SMS, so that I can reach you in 5 sec, Cost you
nothing, you'll read me & I cuold see you smiling which is worth a
million for me
Positive
Every bad situation will have something positive...Even a stopped Clock
is correct twice a day...Think of this & lead your life my
friend....
If...
If smile is a wave I wish you a sea.
if happiness is a leaf I wish you a tree.
If health is a star I wish you a galaxy.
if happiness is a leaf I wish you a tree.
If health is a star I wish you a galaxy.
I Checked my pocket,I Found Nothing, I Checked My Wallet, I Found a Few
Coins.Then I Checked My Heart I Found A Dear friend like U & I
Realised How Rich I am...
God Knows ...
God knows the
Value of HEART.
So He created
LOVE.
He knows the
Value of NIGHT
So He Created
DREAMS.
He knows the
Value of FRIEND
So He created
U
Value of HEART.
So He created
LOVE.
He knows the
Value of NIGHT
So He Created
DREAMS.
He knows the
Value of FRIEND
So He created
U
Eating
Boy: I Wna Tell U Smthn
Grl:Its Nt Gud 2 Talk While Eating
(After Eating)
G:Nw Tell Me
B: Thr Ws A Cockroach In Ur Food.
Grl:Its Nt Gud 2 Talk While Eating
(After Eating)
G:Nw Tell Me
B: Thr Ws A Cockroach In Ur Food.
Lie
Telling a lie is
An Art for a lover
Fault for a little boy
an Accomplishment for a bachelor
And a Matter of survival for a married man.
An Art for a lover
Fault for a little boy
an Accomplishment for a bachelor
And a Matter of survival for a married man.
CriCket maTch
A teacher told all students in a class to write an essay on a cricket match,
All were busy writing except one student. He wrote “Unfortunately DUE TO RAIN, NO MATCH”.
Long Life
Man to God: Please give me a long life.
God: Get married son.
Man: How will it help me God?
God: You will not think of long life ever again.
God: Get married son.
Man: How will it help me God?
God: You will not think of long life ever again.
broke up
I just broke up with someone and the last thing she said to me was:
You will never ever find anyone like me again in your life!
I am thinking, “I should hope not! If I do not want you, why would I want someone like you.
You will never ever find anyone like me again in your life!
I am thinking, “I should hope not! If I do not want you, why would I want someone like you.
A man is talking to God.
A man is talking to God.
The man: "God, how long is a million years?"
God: "To me, it's about a minute."
The man: "God, how much is a million dollars?"
God: "To me it's a penny."
The man: "God, may I have a penny?"
God: "Wait a minute."
God: "To me, it's about a minute."
The man: "God, how much is a million dollars?"
God: "To me it's a penny."
The man: "God, may I have a penny?"
God: "Wait a minute."
Officer
A man was pulled over for driving too fast, even though he thought he was driving just fine.
Officer: You were speeding.
Man: No, I wasn't.
Officer: Yes, you were. I'm giving you a ticket.
Man: But I wasn't speeding.
Officer: Tell that to the judge! (The officer gives man the ticket.)
Man: Would I get another ticket if I called you a jerk?
Officer: Yes, you would.
Man: What if I just thought that you were?
Officer: I can't give you a ticket for what you think.
Man: Fine, I think you're a jerk!
Man: No, I wasn't.
Officer: Yes, you were. I'm giving you a ticket.
Man: But I wasn't speeding.
Officer: Tell that to the judge! (The officer gives man the ticket.)
Man: Would I get another ticket if I called you a jerk?
Officer: Yes, you would.
Man: What if I just thought that you were?
Officer: I can't give you a ticket for what you think.
Man: Fine, I think you're a jerk!
John
John lived with his mother in a rather big house, and when she died, the
house became too big for him so he bought a smaller one in the next
street. There was a very nice old clock in his first house, and when the
men came to take his furniture to the new house, John thought, I am not
going to let them carry my beautiful old clock in their truck. Perhaps
they’ll break it, and then mending it will be very expensive.’ So he
picked it up and began to carry it down the road in his arms.
It was heavy so he stopped two or three times to have a rest.
Then suddenly a small boy came along the road. He stopped and looked at John for a few seconds. Then he said to John, ‘You’re a stupid man, aren’t you? Why don’t you buy a watch like everybody else?
It was heavy so he stopped two or three times to have a rest.
Then suddenly a small boy came along the road. He stopped and looked at John for a few seconds. Then he said to John, ‘You’re a stupid man, aren’t you? Why don’t you buy a watch like everybody else?
I Miss You
I am going to write on all the bricks:
I MISS U
and i wish that one falls on Ur head , so that U knows how it hurts when U miss someone special like U.
I MISS U
and i wish that one falls on Ur head , so that U knows how it hurts when U miss someone special like U.
Wife
Husband asks : Do you know the meaning of WIFE.
It means : Without Information Fighting Everytime!
WIFE says : No , it means:
With Idiot For Ever.
Mobile
What happened 2 Ur mobile?
I was trying 2 call you but i got this msg:
Welcome 2 jungle network , D monkey U r trying 2 call is on tree PLZ try later.
A man was praying to god.
A man was praying to god.
He said, "God?"
God responded,
"Yes?"
And the Guy said, "Can I ask a question?"
"Go right ahead", God said.
"God, what is a million years to you?"
God said, "A million years to me is only a
second."
The man
wondered.
Then he asked, "God, what is a million
dollars worth to you?"
God
said, "A million dollars to me is a penny."
So the man said, "God can I have a penny?"
And God cheerfully
said,
"Sure!...... .just wait a second."
He said, "God?"
God responded,
"Yes?"
And the Guy said, "Can I ask a question?"
"Go right ahead", God said.
"God, what is a million years to you?"
God said, "A million years to me is only a
second."
The man
wondered.
Then he asked, "God, what is a million
dollars worth to you?"
God
said, "A million dollars to me is a penny."
So the man said, "God can I have a penny?"
And God cheerfully
said,
"Sure!...... .just wait a second."
Teacher while lecturing
Teacher while lecturing , noticed a student sleeping at the
back.
Tcher shouts 2 hs neighbor : “ wake him up!”
Neighbor
yells : “U put him 2 sleep , so U wake him up
back.
Tcher shouts 2 hs neighbor : “ wake him up!”
Neighbor
yells : “U put him 2 sleep , so U wake him up
woman who’ll predict her future.
A lady want to see a tarot reader woman
who’ll predict her future.
- , , , , , , Leady , I’m sorry to inform
you that your husband will die in the near future .
- , , , , , , Don’t
tell me things that I already know , tell me if there would be an
investigation
who’ll predict her future.
- , , , , , , Leady , I’m sorry to inform
you that your husband will die in the near future .
- , , , , , , Don’t
tell me things that I already know , tell me if there would be an
investigation
Jack
Jack was attending the funeral service of the richest
man in the city.
Beacause he was weeping bitterly, a man asked
sadly, " was the deceases one of the dear relatives? "No" said jack.
"
Then why are you crying?" asked the stranger. " Because I'm not one of
the relatives," answered jack
man in the city.
Beacause he was weeping bitterly, a man asked
sadly, " was the deceases one of the dear relatives? "No" said jack.
"
Then why are you crying?" asked the stranger. " Because I'm not one of
the relatives," answered jack
canary
A man bought a canary from a store. He asked the seller, "
Are you sure this bird can sign?
" the seller replied, " it is a
wonderful singer."
A week later , the customer reappeared and said, "
This bird you sold me is lame."
the seller answered, " Well, you
said you wanted a singer not a dancer
Are you sure this bird can sign?
" the seller replied, " it is a
wonderful singer."
A week later , the customer reappeared and said, "
This bird you sold me is lame."
the seller answered, " Well, you
said you wanted a singer not a dancer
why women are beautiful
why women are beautiful
'God,'
inquired Adam, 'Why did you make Eve so beautiful?'
'So you would
love her.'
'But why did you make her so dumb?'
'So she
would love you.'
'God,'
inquired Adam, 'Why did you make Eve so beautiful?'
'So you would
love her.'
'But why did you make her so dumb?'
'So she
would love you.'
Thief
1: Look a thief has entered
our kitchen
and he is eating the cake I made.
2: Whom should I
call now,
Police or Ambulance?
HUSBAND and WIFE
HUSBAND and WIFE are like 2 tyres of a
vehicle
If 1 punctures, the vehicle can’t move further
M0ral:
always
Keep a SPARE TYRE
vehicle
If 1 punctures, the vehicle can’t move further
M0ral:
always
Keep a SPARE TYRE
Public Toilet
Marriage is like a
public toilet
Those waiting outside are desperate to get in
&
Those
inside are desperate to come
public toilet
Those waiting outside are desperate to get in
&
Those
inside are desperate to come
Marrying
Hi i am marrying next
week ( Funny sms )
Hi i am marrying next week
there will be a
small party and
only few persons will be invited
Hey don’t bring
any gift
just bring SOMEONE to marry me
week ( Funny sms )
Hi i am marrying next week
there will be a
small party and
only few persons will be invited
Hey don’t bring
any gift
just bring SOMEONE to marry me
Difference b/w secretary & private
Difference b/w secretary & private
secretary
Q: What is the difference b/w secretary & private
secretary?
Ans:
Secretary says GOOD MORNING SIR
&
Private
secretary says ITS MORNING SIR
secretary
Q: What is the difference b/w secretary & private
secretary?
Ans:
Secretary says GOOD MORNING SIR
&
Private
secretary says ITS MORNING SIR
Future plans of childrens
Future plans of
childrens:
Teacher asks children, what do u wish 2 do in future?
Adnan:
I want 2 b a pilot.
Wakeel: I want 2 b a doctor.
Bina: I want 2 b
a good mother.
Shariq : I want 2 help Bina
childrens:
Teacher asks children, what do u wish 2 do in future?
Adnan:
I want 2 b a pilot.
Wakeel: I want 2 b a doctor.
Bina: I want 2 b
a good mother.
Shariq : I want 2 help Bina
Mr Bean
Mr.Bean Science
.
I was stuck in ELEVATOR for 3 hrs
Due to
electric failure
Mr.Bean:
Ya me too
I was stuck on ESCALATOR
for 5 hrs
.
I was stuck in ELEVATOR for 3 hrs
Due to
electric failure
Mr.Bean:
Ya me too
I was stuck on ESCALATOR
for 5 hrs
Exam
Exams are like girl friends
- difficult 2 understand
- too many questions
- more explanations are needed
And results are most of the time failure…
- difficult 2 understand
- too many questions
- more explanations are needed
And results are most of the time failure…
The Big Sissy
One summer evening during a violent thunderstorm a mother was tucking
her small boy into bed. She was about to turn off the light when he
asked with a tremor in his
voice, ”Mommy, will you sleep with me tonight?”
His mother smiled and gave him a reassuring hug. ”I can’t dear,” she said. ”I have to sleep in daddy’s room.”
A long silence was broken at last by his little voice. ”The big sissy.”
voice, ”Mommy, will you sleep with me tonight?”
His mother smiled and gave him a reassuring hug. ”I can’t dear,” she said. ”I have to sleep in daddy’s room.”
A long silence was broken at last by his little voice. ”The big sissy.”
Your Wife Called
The boss was complaining in our staff meeting the other day that he wasn’t getting any respect.
The next day, he brought a small sign that
Read:
“I’m the Boss!”
He then taped it to his office door.
Later that day when he returned from lunch, he found that someone had taped a note to the sign that said:
” Your wife called, she wants her sign back!”
The next day, he brought a small sign that
Read:
“I’m the Boss!”
He then taped it to his office door.
Later that day when he returned from lunch, he found that someone had taped a note to the sign that said:
” Your wife called, she wants her sign back!”
Give a Five Dollars
Two lawyers and their boss go out for lunch and run into a genie.
“If you all give me five dollars each, I’ll grant you one wish.” The genie sighed.
All three lawyers debated and gave the genie fifteen dollars total. The
first one goes, “I would like to go to Paradise and never come back.”
He was gone.
“Wow, that was some serious,” said the other two.
The second lawyer goes and wishes for a beautiful wife and unlimited money in Paradise.
The boss looks at his watch and says to the genie, “I want them both back by 3:30.”
conclusion : always let your boss to be the first one to decide or god knows what happens!
“If you all give me five dollars each, I’ll grant you one wish.” The genie sighed.
All three lawyers debated and gave the genie fifteen dollars total. The
first one goes, “I would like to go to Paradise and never come back.”
He was gone.
“Wow, that was some serious,” said the other two.
The second lawyer goes and wishes for a beautiful wife and unlimited money in Paradise.
The boss looks at his watch and says to the genie, “I want them both back by 3:30.”
conclusion : always let your boss to be the first one to decide or god knows what happens!
Funny Jok
Son: mom, when I was on the bus with my father this morning, he told me 2 give up my seat 2 a lady.
Mother: Well, you have done the right thing son.
Son: But mother, I was sitting on my father’s lap.
Mother: Whaaatttt!!!!!??
Mother: Well, you have done the right thing son.
Son: But mother, I was sitting on my father’s lap.
Mother: Whaaatttt!!!!!??
Three Fastest means of communication
Three Fastest means of communication
first : Tele-Phone
second : Tele-Vision
third : Tell-a-women
Need still faster?
Easy! just Tell her not to tell anyone.
first : Tele-Phone
second : Tele-Vision
third : Tell-a-women
Need still faster?
Easy! just Tell her not to tell anyone.
A Virtual Store
I saw whistled brain
Virtual Store in Korea
You choose when you proceed to walk digitally proceed to walk to the polls and all of them are there, you're account
Virtual Store in Korea
You choose when you proceed to walk digitally proceed to walk to the polls and all of them are there, you're account
I Love My Mother
Human body can bear only up to 45 units of pain after the birth, a woman
feels the pain to get the equivalent of 57 to 20 bones getting
fractured at
Cheers all mom world
Cheers all mom world
A Lovely Boy
I've seen bikes
I saw a tricycle
I saw four cycles
But never knew that there is a cycle
The eyes of the Kurdish accuracy crime
I saw a tricycle
I saw four cycles
But never knew that there is a cycle
The eyes of the Kurdish accuracy crime
If You Want Happiness ...
If you want happiness for a real life marriage has survived, including
the six that never get used. If you have found your ideal partner and
you should feel really lucky to have this issue as well as how to think
this is the continuation of happiness
Sleeping In ClaSs
I admit once I was sleeping in class
Master grumbled head will come up
Said you were sleeping
Hole I'm not a teacher, I was lying
Nothing on a armrest guys were hitting the gas
Master grumbled head will come up
Said you were sleeping
Hole I'm not a teacher, I was lying
Nothing on a armrest guys were hitting the gas
A Lovely Girl
Do not be shy.
Do not look at me like that ...
You're an angel in my eyes the whole world more beautiful
Even with
The dress worn
With wrinkled hands and frost
Smile for my doll
You share a small piece of the world that you have on hand
Even with
The dress worn
With wrinkled hands and frost
Smile for my doll
You share a small piece of the world that you have on hand
A Great Man
In this photo more than 2 million visitors and more than two hundred thousand Facebook Likes have to. Want to know the reason:
The American men have big dog himself every day from 8 months to treat joint pain lake water cuts. In this photo you can see when the pain down her face, breasts, how does the owner ....
The American men have big dog himself every day from 8 months to treat joint pain lake water cuts. In this photo you can see when the pain down her face, breasts, how does the owner ....
takh you very very much
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)